Dear Diary (Week 13),

I used to wish that I could mend some of the relationships I had with men. But I now realize that certain people aren't worth it. Without these men in my life, the stress, frustration and the feeling of being trapped that comes with being with them is gone. After all, I can't make these men change, I can only inspire them to do so. If they aren't willing to make the effort, I'm not willing to have them in my life.

I sometimes think, if only he did that (example: texted me more often), or if only he was not like that (example: rude), we would be a perfect match. Reality is, if you're open with your partner about how you feel and they don't care to change, they don't care about you enough. I like to surround myself with nice people, who care about me.

The worst kind of prison is a self-imposed one. There are two components to a self-imposed prison: restraints we put on ourselves and allowing others in our life who impose these restraints. What's common to both is that only we have the power to release ourselves from the shackles. We must find the courage to do so. Breaking our own barriers is one of life's biggest challenges but it's also one of the most freeing feelings.

Some people are just miserable and seek to spread their misery. It's difficult to have a relationship with these people. Other people have not come far in their self-growth, also making it difficult for someone to be in a relationship with them. Whatever the reason for the failing relationship, I choose to free myself of toxicity. I choose to transform the negative energy in my life into positive energy, by surrounding myself with men who are positive.

It's good to give chances to people, insofar as we have reasonable belief that they will change their ways. I no longer want to give a guy a second chance and then hope he'll change. If a guy wants another chance, let him first prove to me that he's a changed man. My time is too limited and my heart is too precious to be sucked into back and forth relationships. Sometimes, it's just time to let go.

Love,

Faigy