The Tears I Cry

The tears I cry over you are temporary.

In the morning, my pillowcase will be dry.
Tears of pain that I know all too well.

I’ve been disappointed many times.

That won’t stop me from believing in others.

It only takes one person who is right for me.

Who will love me and care.

You think I’m too emotional.

I think you’re too toxic.

You think I’m too negative.

I think you’re too insensitive.

Now I know how little I matter to you.

Now I know that it’s time to move on.

Your loss will be for you to regret.

You said what you said.

You did what you did.

You are who you are.

I can do better.

Forgiveness: A Gift To Myself

I realized that I feel slighted easily by people: colleagues, classmates, friends, family and partners. Worse yet, I often hold a grudge. I may never act on the grudge but it festers. I have a phenomenal memory, when it comes to situations in which others have hurt me. Yet, compliments and positive moments I’ve shared with others, often slip my mind. I want to let go of the toxicity and gain control of my feelings.

When men are unkind to me, all the times they hurt me comes to the forefront of my mind. I not only become angry about one situation but the accumulation of all the prior times where I was hurt. I feel so bad that there is not much that can get me out of that tornado of negativity. I feel trapped in my anger. I may keep these memories at the back of my mind but they remain close to my heart. 

I don’t blame myself for things that I’ve been through with men. But I do take ownership in how I interpret situations and how I let them effect me. It’s difficult for me to try and let go without apologies and closure. It’s difficult for me not to let my emotions take over me and get angry times three at these men for hurting me. Although, my best revenge is to be happy and positive. Forgiveness is a gift I want to give to myself. I deserve it.

Race Against Time

“Life is short”, they say.

“So live it up each and every day”.

Life is short in numbers but not in time.

Life outside the box is seen as a crime.

Time is portrayed as the enemy.

It’s all about finishing school and finding love already.

We look around us for inspiration.

We look at others with admiration.

We feel like we’re behind in everything.

We want to find love already- we’re aging.

We look at others with the perfect career.

Time only advances and we feel nowhere near.

We believe we better get there fast.

Because we don’t want to finish last.

Thing is, success comes in many different forms.

We each have our unique strengths; there are no norms.

We each have our own timeline.

Sooner or later, we’ll shine.

Success is going at our own pace.

We must not race.